Thursday the 20th of Oct. we are set to make the trip to almost into Philly, to go through a 3 hr intake interview at ReMed, the brain injury rehab center. We will sign releases for records from Good Shepherd and then take a tour. The following Monday they have a committee meeting and make a decision on acceptance into the program, and then it will be just waiting for bed availability. Also, I was told I have to sign a "disposition" before he's admitted, agreeing he can come back home here when the treatment is done. Apparently there are people who at the end of their ropes take loved ones there for treatment and then decide they dont want to bring them back home. Of COURSE I want him back home. I also do know though that if he doesnt try to make progress anymore and doesnt improve behaviorally, I will need to discuss with his family the need for them to take him. I cant have my home upset any longer if he continues the way he is going...
The place sounds nice...in a suburb called Paoli, and the building is actually a renovated old farmhouse. Sounds simple....
Its not going to be that simple. While Danny was receptive to the idea initially, he now keeps saying he's not going cuz he doesn't need something like that. There's nothing wrong with him he says.
Things are worsening here at home with him, and my patience has worn very thin. As much as I love him, if he is determined to resolve himself to giving up any hope of progress now, and stay in this awful state of denial about what's wrong in his brain...well I simply can not accept that. He has become so overly dependant on me for everything, and there is no motivation to do anything, including even to shower regularly. His attitude is, "I died and this is how I am now, so I'm just going to live...eat, sleep."
No, I dont think so. He is capable of getting better, and this place can and will help him. His short term memory is slowly regressing, largely due to the fact that he refuses to either go to therapy, as well as do what they tell him to in order to exercise his brain cells and help them re-connect. His medication situation is horrible also. In my opinion he is on way too much medication and all it does is make him sleep, and then when he is awake he gets agitated about the false things he believes to be true. He doesnt want to eat correctly and is obsessed with eating chocolate, to the tune of 12 hershey bars a day. He is gaining so much weight. He's letting himself go. I refuse to accept this behavior when there is help out there for him. I am basically giving him an ultimatum...he needs to go or else he will need to move to other family. I've done everything humanly possible to help him, but I wont just nurse him for the rest of my life. I wont tolerate his nasty talk and actions either. My youngest boy is affected and the line must be drawn. No one is more important than my children.
When I look back at the early times right after the accident, and the terrific progress he made, it makes me heartsick. To love someone soooo much, but cant make it better FOR them....
